It feels right

Soon after I found out that we were having twins, T and I ordered two cribs. I thought we might as well since, shoot, even though we won't need them for awhile, we eventually will. 

Hrmmm.

Iris' room obviously sat empty for a length of time and we moved the extra crib box down into our basement. I called Babies R' Us to see about returning it, but since 90 days had passed and I could no longer find the receipt, accepting it as a return was special needs. I didn't have the energy to deal with that.

My mom offered to pick it up and ship it back to Babies R' Us since we ordered it online, but again--too much energy, too much thought. 

And so it sat unopened in our basement. The fog in my head eventually lifted and I decided that we would keep it and donate it. Donate it to a cause or group or individual where I felt good and at peace about where it was going. 

There was a drive at church for baby items and I contemplated donating it then, but it didn't feel quite right.

T cleaned out our basement a few weeks ago and we put a crapton of things out in the garage for Salvation Army to pick-up and even more things out on the curb with a "Free!" sign on them. "Should I move that box out?" he asked. "No. I'm keeping it and going to donate it when it feels right." "Okay," he said.

A few weeks ago I and one of Iris' beloved teachers at school were talking about weekend plans. She shared that she and her boyfriend might go shopping for a bed for the sweet boy that stays with them; hopefully soon staying overnight.

"I have a bed! I mean, it's a crib, but it's a 4-in-1 and new in the box and you're more than welcome to have it. Really. It's white, so hopefully that doesn't feel too girly, but it's never been used. No pressure, though, if you decide it's not for you. Truly."

It came out of my mouth before I even realized it.

And so she is going to take it to their home for their little boy.

I didn't tell her how or why we happen to have an extra crib in a box in our basement. I was worried--and am even still a bit apprehensive--that it would or will be seen as the Crib for the Baby That Died. 

But this woman, Iris' teacher, means the world to us and so I'm happy that the bed is finding its perfect home.